My Room

We transitioned Miss C out of her old room and into her new "big girl" room awhile ago. Wanted to get her settled in her new space before Miss R came. Up until now she's done pretty well with the move.

Last night however, she started calling Miss R's room "My Room" and I had visions of a bit of a struggle for her when Miss R arrives. Many of the baby things were Miss C's and she is right in every way that they are/were hers. A toddler doesn't fully understand that it was hers first but now will be for the new baby no matter how hard you try to explain it.

I expect that she'll revert back a little bit to wanting to play with toys and things that she has long outgrown simply because they are there. I expect many discussions about sharing and many tears over what she clearly knows was hers and now is being used by someone else.

The Final Countdown

My due date is next Tuesday. Despite some signs this week that Miss R's arrival might be coming, she is not here yet. Looks like she may be like her sister in her desire to stay nice and snug in Mom's belly. Mom on the other hand is ready for her to arrive.

I have taken pictures of myself at 37 and 39 weeks. Both scarey and both I took myself so the angle is all weird. But really, when you look like you have an over-inflated basketball shoved up your shirt there really isn't a good angle.

I got back to the doctor today to find out if I have made any progress. Nothing has changed over the last 3 weeks so I am holding out hope that this is the day/week.

Miss R continues to ball herself up on my right side and it's very noticeable that she's there. I am seeing what I think are her little feet, knees, elbows and hands moving all around as well. Not quite sure where else there is for her to go but she seems to be exploring the possibilities.

I'll keep you posted.

What to do when you are waiting...

Someone made a comment to me this week about how they had never met anyone in their life that disliked pregnancy as much as I do. I could go off on many directions here regarding how many inappropriate things people say to you when you are pregnant, or how quick people are to judge, or how many times I have cried during this pregnancy over things people have said that I just don't think they should say...but I won't. That's not really want I want to say, though I could go on for DAYS.

What I want to say is, you don't have to like pregnancy to love your children.

I think there are plenty of women in this world who do not enjoy pregnancy. They don't glow. They don't find it to be the most beautiful experience of their life. They throw up each and every day of their pregnancy. They are in a great deal of pain that isn't relieved no matter what they do. This just flat out dislike the experience.

The difference between myself and many of them (and what I told the person who said this to me) is that I am not afraid to say I don't enjoy it. It makes me very sad to know there are still so many women out there who feel like they can't be honest because doing so somehow equates to not loving the child you are carrying.

That is the farthest thing from the truth. I love Miss C in ways I never thought imaginable and hated every vomit-filled day of my pregnancy. I love Miss R, though I have never met her, but have not enjoyed every painful day I have carried her.

I am glad there are women out there who have wonderfully glowing pregnancies. I wish I could be in their group, but I am not. Instead, I accept who I am and how I feel. People just need to get over it if they don't agree.

Tumble for you

Yesterday was one of those days where you just want to rewind and start over. It had the potential to start off much better. We got a leisurely start to the day because Miss C had a doc appointment. It's always nicer to just take our time in the morning rather than feeling rushed to get out the door.

We were almost ready to head to the doctor and SP decided to go with us. His shoes were downstairs and Miss C wanted to help Daddy get his shoes. Next thing we know, she has fallen down the basement stairs. I am surprised I didn't deliver immediately in the kitchen because SP's reaction, in addition to her falling down the stairs, scared the crap out of me.

Thankfully, she was no hurt other than a rug burn on her elbow. The doctor checked her out when we went to her appointment too, just to be sure. It could have turned out so much worse so I am thankful she wasn't hurt. It was bound to happen at some point, but I could have done without it happening at all.

In other news her doc appointment was to check out two things. The first is a skin irritation she has had for some time. We've been trying to treat it with over the counter lotions because of its bumpy, dry skin nature. This wasn't working. Turns out she has keratosis pilaris and we got a prescription yesterday that hopefully will help.

We also have been noticing her right foot turning in a bit when she walks so we wanted to have that checked out as well. It's not impacting her ability to walk or run or play but wanted to have it checked just to be sure nothing was wrong. Per the doctor we are to just watch it for now and plan on coming back in after the baby is born to have it re-checked by an orthopedist. The doctor did say she thought they would just want to monitor it as well but she wanted to confirm.

Oh...and lastly, I am still pregnant.

Blinded by the light

Yesterday I ended up at the doctor a day early due to some blurred vision and difficulty focusing on anything. I was also having headaches so they had me come in to check my blood pressure. Turns out that it's just allergies. Blood pressure is fine.

I am still 1 cm dilated and am now 50% effaced. Miss R is still head down and I am not sure she has any plans to arrive any time soon.

At work they threw me a small shower and I got some super cute outfits and a handmade blanket. Love it. This weekend I will get her room finalized and we are taking Miss C out to let her pick out a gift for the the new baby. We also got a gift for Miss C that Miss R will bring when she arrives (via her Mommy of course).

I keep reminding myself that in just a few short weeks I'll have two kids which freaks me out a bit. I am also excited though to meet Miss R because I am sure she is going to be as wonderful as her big sister.

Shut your mouth

In the last two days the following statements have been made to me...

Random person - "You look like you are about to explode."

and

Random person - "When are you due?"
Me - "3 Weeks"
Random person - "What are you doing out?"

I have seriously had my fair share of people making the rudest, most inappropriate, most insensitive comments about me and my pregnant state. Not really sure what people are thinking but the shit that comes out of their mouths is amazing.

Maybe I am just too sensitive about all things pregnancy but I think it's difficult enough to deal with the hormones, weight gain and sleeplessness associated with pregnancy. Throw in people telling you how big you are, how tired you look and how crabby you are and well, it's too much.

So, I am going to try to not tell anyone to f-off in the next 3 weeks but people are making it very difficult. Very difficult.

3 Weeks and Counting

At this point in my pregnancy I have 3 weeks left until my due date. Miss R is having a little party on the right side of my body and it's often quite noticeable that she is there. I am starting to freak out a bit and my level of worry for her and about her is greatly increasing.

I worry about her health. I worry that her delivery will go smoothly and that when she arrives there will be no complications. I worry that Miss C won't react positively to her arrival and that I won't be able to give them both all of my love. I worry and worry and worry.

Because of the worry, I am trying to focus on those last minute things to get ready for her arrival. Today I bought the outfit for her first picture and for when we bring her home. I feel compelled to make sure she has new things even though we have TONS of things from when Miss C was born.

I am trying to keep myself from worrying unnecessarily because things will happen as they are supposed to, but I just want my girl to be healthy and happy.