5 years

Dear Cara Beara,
You are now 5 years old and honestly I am not sure where the time went. Each and every day I look at you and still feel that deep, deep overwhelming love that I had the day we met. I actually think I love you more as I watch you grow into a little girl.

You have been accepted into kindergarten and will start in the Fall. They scored you based on some standardize testing and observation. I was, and am, so proud that you scored above average with regards to your readiness. I know you are smart and now others do too.

I am really struggling with allowing you to do more 5 year old things. I know I cannot shelter you from hurt and pain, those are just part of life. But I really want to. I hate to see the look of sadness and disappointment in your eyes. It kills me.

I am also fearful of this world we live in. Things seem much more complicated and dangerous. You are so sweet and innocent. I do not want the outside world to destroy the beauty that is you. So I cling tightly, probably too tightly, and I know that is not always good.

One day when you are older you may question your crazy Mom, but please know my intentions always start in a place of love.

Now, to who you are at 5. You are successfully growing out of all your clothes and shoes. And when we do but you clothes you want tutus and skirts. Anything that twirls. Your favorite pair of shoes light up and Aunt Roni bought them for you.

On your actual birthday we got your hair cut in the most adorable bob. I love it and you look super cute. You love wearing headbands and doing your own hair.

Drawing, cutting, coloring and other crafty things are top of your list. You also love to sing and dance. You will both sing along with the radio and make up your own songs.

The majority of the time you are sweet and loving with Ramsey. You are still sisters so I do expect some fighting and you all do that too. I love to see you take her hand and help her along. You also are extremely involved in the OT we do with her. Our little therapist.

Being your Mommy is one of the best things I have ever done. I am not perfect but I try really hard to ensure you are happy and healthy. I look forward to watching you grow but I am also sad to let my little girl go.

I love you with all my heart.

Happy 5th birthday!

Love Mommy