Yesterday for the first time EVER, Miss C refused to eat her dinner. The turkey and stuffing went untouched in favor of the applesauce. She then proceeded to throw a crying fit because we would not give her the non-dinner foods she pointed at. We tried to hide the turkey in the applesauce but she just pulled the turkey out of her mouth and threw it on the floor.
I even tried this new tactic from a book I am reading by giving her options...which basically was eat your dinner and get vanilla wafers for dessert or don't eat your dinner and get nothing else including vanilla wafers. That didn't work either.
This puts us, as parents, in an awkward position. We are faced with the decision to a) make her something she will eat or b) put her to bed without a decent meal.
There are a few things I am pretty adament about and one of them is I will not get in the habit of making my child a separate meal. No one ever made me a separate meal and believe me there were plenty of times I didn't like what we were having and tried to come up with creative ways to not have to eat it. Still, I learned the lesson through many a painful night of sitting at the dinner table long after everyone else had gotten up, you eat the dinner that was made for you.
This is a lot more difficult to teach when it's your child and you are afraid they will be hungry. Logic tells me that Miss C is well fed and missing this meal did not mean she would starve nor did it mean we were bad parents for sticking to our guns.
The not so logical side tells me I am neglecting my child and depriving her of one of her basic needs and will scar her for like. It says I am a horrible mother and we are horrible parents.
In the end, we did not give her anything else to eat. No separate meal. No vanilla wafers. No nothing. Miss C did not eat her stuffed animals due to hungry. She didn't stay up all night crying because she was starving. No one called the police and reported us for bad parenting.
I hope tonight goes differently because I am quite sure that is not something I want to have to do again any time soon.
1 comment:
One of my friends does the 'choices' method and it was quite amazing to see. Granted, he's 3 and has had some years with this now - but it does seem to work with time. He can have oatmeal with raisins and nuts, or oatmeal with no raisins or nuts. Either way - he's getting oatmeal. I thought it was quite cool. The parents admitted to doing the same to each other :)
Sounds like you totally did the right thing.
Good for you!
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